my words are still scarce, and i miss them.
and i have too many essays to write and not nearly enough motivation
for any of them.
sociology and psychology are both interesting, but my attention span isn't
nearly long enough for me to take it all in, and understand it to its full extent.
i just cannot concentrate, and i'm not doing well given i'm only
a few short weeks into first term.
nothing is making my blood race, and the oceans that are in my
chest are slowing and stilling and i miss the constant
rush that reminded me to breath.
somethings got to give.
i have things i'm planning to get done in the next few weeks
there are addresses nestled in my inboc, awaiting letters and care
packages and general love from the other side of the world.
[you know who you are, and i promise it will get there soon]
i want to get a tattoo on me as soon as i can, i've been 18 for long enough
and i need something on me to stay strong, before i run dry of everything
and crumble into dust. i need his words on my skin, and i need to
be able to look at it whenever my chest tightens and i feel like
i'm about to pass out.
[eugh, i am not really okay. its hard to explain this feeling]
but i am too poor to afford it, and i'm yet to find the right words.
[emily, your lovely ink re-sparked the intense love for this]
i also need to get my mind back, and brush the dust off my camera and start finding
the beautiful side of this world again, and realise that its more than just
whatever green is creeping across my skin.
forests, and water and his body will make it better.
how are all of you?
does anyone have any prompts i can have a go at?
see if i can get my words back little bit by little bit?