weak willed and weaker breathed

Deviation Actions

ohsparrowsong

Published: Nov 26, 2012

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Literature Text

_{you always had this way of getting right to the very core of me, feeling everything more
than it should be, polarized emotions. i would spend whole days with my lips quivering
and my vision blurred around the edges from the dopamine you sent coursing though
my veins like rapids. i was so close to invincible it scared me.
i think that fear was the only thing that ever kept me grounded with you.

you made me fear my own body. i saw the warning signs but that didn't make it
any easier. winter winds would wind their way through and around my ribcage
and leave my skin purple and blue and white. that was the most colour i could
muster when the high wore off and i would crash. the seeing it and still hurting made
me unsure about you. i knew one day you would break my bones like they were
toothpicks, and i knew this with certainty. it still made me ache for what felt like
forever when it happened. i think it made it worse, seeing it coming and not
changing a damned thing.

once it was while i was driving from your house after you told me you could never
love someone like me. the lights from passing cars looked inviting and i almost turned
the wheel into one particularly bright set of yellows. i had over thought what you meant
when you said 'someone like me' and it still tasted like almosts and notquites
and that made my stomach reject everything, and i wished my brain or heart could
reject you so easily.}